Everyone identifies with red=stop, amber=wait and green=go. It's a system often used in behaviour management. I've devised a method using traffic lights to help jelibeans identify what a situation may be like. It's easy to make a set of your own traffic lights - all you need is a colours or crayons, stiff card, sticky-back plastic, scissors and some ribbon.
Cut out three circles of each colour, Red, Orange Green. Cover them with clear film (just makes them a little stronger, but this is optional). Punch a hole in all three and thread on some ribbon. Hey presto portable traffic light communication at minimal cost. You can design your own, personalise them and get a jelibean or two to make some too.
Day-trips or visits to family can be both unpredictable and often stressful. Jelibean HATE being embarrassed or shown up in front of others. Embarrassment will often lead to MELTDOWN. Use your traffic lights as a private signal/communication. Maybe your little darling is saying a little too much about dad's visit to the wine bar last week - flash the AMBER disc and that should hopefully stop them in their tracks without anyone else knowing.
Traffic lights can also be used for short cuts in communication. Jelibeans returning home from school may not feel or want to discuss their day with you, they may not be able to remember everything that has happened. Don't ask them if they have stomped through the door with sweaty faces - just show them the discs and one word - RED, AMBER OR GREEN. It isn't rocket science to realise that RED means BAD day. When your jelibean disappears to their room you know why. You can do gentle questioning later.
Traffic lights can also be used in this way:
Explaining that school is always a green zone. It is SAFE, structured, supervised and enclosed. Therefore, the behaviour must remain on green. It's important that in green zones that behaviour is modified. A green zone indicates a good place for your child to be and that's what we are striving to ensure. In order to maintain a place in a good zone, you have to behave. Otherwise, you lose a vital green zone.
Traffic light colours work equally well with behaviour. It should be fairly obvious to most that green is good, amber could be a problem looming so watch out, and red means totally off the scale, unacceptable and dangerous.
In the classroom, my children find it useful to have their own personal red, green and orange cards so that they may quietly alert the teacher to how they are feeling. It's important to share your observations with your child. A restless jelibean doesn't even notice what their body is doing, you are the best person to show them that when those butterflies are making too many flutters in your tummy, it may be because you are upset, so encourage them to show the amber card. By identifying to your child and their teacher/classroom assistant their changes in body language you will be helping the class immensely.
Traffic lights will also enable the child's friends to identify potentially dangerous situations before they happen.
Our local school embraced this system and the class teachers have their own personal set of cards as well and with nothing more than a look and a showing of a card, communication is simple and accurate. Jelibeans don't do verbal communication well especially when under a spotlight in front of a lot of class mates.
One tip you may find useful is that zones can change colour. For example, school, which is always a green, can suddenly turn to red if a day trip out is planned. A school trip is always a red zone for a jelibean. It's a new experience, new surroundings, possibly even a coach trip and a packed lunch and a bag of sweets for the journey and maybe if your jelibeans are like mine, the mobile phone or games console has sneaked in all by itself. These trips cause havoc to a jelibean brain. There is so much to look at, to do, to touch, its just overwhelming. A jelibean brain reaches melt-down quite quickly. So you have to prepare your child for the trip, explain that they have to be extremely well behaved, polite and vigilant. It's all too common for these little jelibean to become so overloaded with all the new experiences, sounds, colours and different people. It's easy to become absorbed and therefore, even easier to become LOST.
Summarising traffic lights.
1. Explain clearly what the colours mean. It's important to remember that a jelIbean's interpretation maybe different from yours.
2. If a potential red situation is approaching or an amber is not converting to green, my advice is to distract your jelibean with a task. Don't tell them what you're doing. As soon as they realise, it will make the situation worse.
3. Scoring can be used as a gauge in progress and rewards can be given. For example, three greens in a row in a week = a note of praise home. Five greens surely entitles your jelIbean to a very special certificate to take home.